Even just to be your shadow would make my day...

This morning I woke up from a dream of presence. I tried to go back to sleep to resume it but it was useless. Then that title popped in my head.

Am I going looney or what? But that's what I feel. We could be doing something together or be in the same room yet she would not know I was there. There is a barrier between me and her, and I feel incapable of interacting with her. I guess a lot of that has to do with being anxious. I'm so self conscious and worried that anything I say or do may give clues to her or others. So I'm stuck with whatever I get and at best I'm just her shadow...

I'm confused, I don't know what to do. Should I leave it, should I forget about her or is there something there? Or nothing at all.

It's as if you know

Not once, or twice, but it's been a few times now that I have a feelign that she knows more than she lets out. Maybe it is just my wishful thinking but sometimes I just feel as if she knows what I feel and is sending sublimial messages to me. Of coures it could just be pure coincidence. "Take the risk and face the consequnces".

Sometimes I'd just be thinking abotu her and then she'd appear or even talk to me. It's eerie and I really don't know what's going on...